After a near 14 hour flight across the pond, otherwise known as the Arctic Ocean… I deplaned in Beijing to find myself nearly wiping out in a pile of vomit, getting fingerprinted, and pushing myself through the crowds to get on a tram to luggage. It only took 6 failed attempts, before finally arriving to pick up my life, which was jam-packed into 4 over large and over weight suitcases, and 1 over flowing tote. Don’t even get me started on the hell that was O’Hare baggage drop off and TSA. “Yes, ma’am, I know my checked baggage exceeds the 50 lb. limit per bag” and “Yes, ma’am I do know my carry ons do NOT fit in that bin”. Let’s not even go there… The only thing that got me through was the beer waiting for me on the other side. Side note: maybe leave the bedroom rug(s), 14 picture frames, and board games at home.
Start looking up videos on minimalist packing because the Beijing airport is not the place you want to be, in the middle of summer, with bags you can barely manage. After collecting and organizing your luggage onto one of their many helpful carts, minutes later you find yourself unloading and reloading once again, so that they can screen shot all of your belongings. Then the unbearable heat hits… it suffocates you as you push yourself through the crowds and crowds of people trying to leave the airport. It also didn’t help to save weight in my luggage, that I wore my uggs… in 90+ degree weather. Lord only knows what the Asians thought about this American transplant.
Thankfully, the school I am teaching at was gracious enough to meet my colleagues and I, leading the way through the chaos.
I’m not going to lie- I expected immediate culture shock. A week in, and experiences later, I’m still wondering when it will hit.
My first experience with a Squat Toilet should have done it for me. You’re literally peeing or… into a hole. You wouldn’t think it’s possible to miss the hole altogether, but it’s easy to do, trust me. I still question, do you face the wall, or the stall door? Then, you realize you’re in a stall with no toilet paper… Ladies (& gents if needed), pack your pocket tissues. I never thought I would be scouring the baby section at a Chinese Walmart for butt wipes. Also, soap isn’t a thing in Chinese public restrooms. Pack your hand sanitizer. Gals, your clutch just got demoted by a tote.
For many traveling to China, or choosing to live in China, chances are you will be living in a larger town. Even the smallest of towns have a population of over half a million people. Even though my mailing address says Beijing, population of a *reported* 22 million… I am living and working within a farming community, to call it at best… a community that no taxi or didi wants to pick up from or drop off to. Dogs and a horse roam the village, while ducks, chickens, and caged pigeons line the streets.
Even though it may take a 15 minute car ride to get to Walmart for my Diet Coke, caffeine fix, life in the country does have its perks. The air is cleaner, you are provided peace and quiet from the hustle and bustle of the city, you are able to strengthen the bond with those you work and live with, and the daily walks can be quite beautiful… and eventful.
Late afternoons are the perfect time to explore during the summer and early fall months. Be adventurous, and go down the random alley, make the wrong turn. You never know what will be around the next corner and all that you can discover! Also, share your wandering tales with others— you never know who may come across the incognito corner store, where you can grab your after work beer(s).
Only being here a week, the first was set aside for errands and a few “tourist attractions”. We’ll start with errands. Let me just start off by saying, thank God, the Walmart is within a shopping center with a KFC and Pizza Hut and that IKEA has their standard food court. After days of a diet consisting of white rice, vegetables, and picking through questionable pieces of meat… especially encountering the wandering animals and let’s call them for better words, chicken farms, while hearing your food is “locally sourced”… all you want is a pepperoni pizza (I hit that up twice in 3 days), or really, anything. You should have seen me at the import section at Walmart. Load me up! Load me up!
Prior to venturing to Walmart, I of course, like any curious American used to American standards, researched Chinese Walmarts. This is where my title comes into play… Don’t believe everything you read on the internet. I read on some very credible sites, that I would step onto an escalator and find myself welcomed by a pile of pig heads in a large dirty store with screaming Asians.
Yes, there are Asians screaming to buy such and such a product, or even a megaphone obscurely placed in an aisle repeating its pitch, but somehow, even a gal with a touch of ADHD, can block it out. It’s not as bad as it’s hyped up to be. I’ve been to the same Walmart twice now, and I’m itching to go back. It reminds me of home. Getting a cart, going up and down the aisles and looking at all of the familiar products…. and the very UNfamiliar products. The selection is large and the prices are a bit lower than an American Walmart. Some things are a downright steal… a 12 pack of 24oz PBR’s for $5USD, say what?! Hence, why I said- load me up!
IKEA needs no further explanation. It’s IKEA, only full of Asians socializing in the living areas… or taking an afternoon nap. Expect a line in the food court, but keep a look out for the express food line. Everyone wants in on those Swedish meatballs and plate of spaghetti!
As a group we ventured to Tiananmen Square, Wangfujing Snack Street, and Beihai Park. I know Tiananmen Square has a rich and intriguing history, but the security line to get in was intense with numerous police, bag screenings and passport scanners…. If you’re pressed for time, catch the view from across the street. The only plus is if you are visiting the Forbidden City… 2 birds with 1 stone.
Wangfujing Snack Street was everything I expected it to be. I grabbed a cold can of beer and perused the numerous stalls of smoking drinks, kebabs, your choice of live or fried insects or raw seafood on a stick… I stayed away from all foods on a stick, for the exception of the candied strawberries- delicious, sweet treats! However, I am discouraging no one from stepping out of their comfort zone and trying all that Wangfujing has to offer! If you try the living, breathing scorpions and don’t end up in a bathroom hours later, or worse, let me know how that goes for you…
Onto Beihai Park- it’s beautiful! From the historic buildings, artists sidewalk “painting” Chinese characters, the ponds that you can explore by rented boat (some in the shape of lotus flowers or rubber ducks), or taking a hike… there is so much to do here and a lovely few hours to be spent! Just have a designated meeting spot for lost children… or adults.
I know taxi’s and Didi’s are readily available in the big city… but live like a local and take the subway and buses. They are an attraction all in themselves! Crowd together, take in allllll the smells, and learn to be aggressive. Be, be aggressive!
Over the weekends we revert back to the city girls we are. The gal pals and I rented an AirBNB in Salitun, SOHO last weekend. Sanlitun provided us the culinary delights and night life we were craving… and that you can expect in any large city. If you’re wondering if they have Mexican food in China— they do! In Sanlitun, and it’s incredible! A lot of expats and tourists hang out in the area, and you are sure to meet a mix of people from all around the world. The clubs are fun, the music scene is actually REALLY good, and the drinks will get you to where you want to be…
You want BBQ? Mexican? Italian? Head to Sanlitun. It’s also a great area to meet up with your Tinder “dates”.
Yes, tinder. Never did I ever think I’d be blogging, promoting Tinder. However, it’s a bit different than the states… Those abroad on tinder don’t just mull around for days with the endless extended back and forth… which you end up ghosting because you’re over it. Here— You’re added on WeChat and got yourself a date, all in the first conversation. I have to say, it’s pretty incredible… and good for the ego. I’m not saying though, that you still won’t get the occasional below the belt, under the pants photo… or video 😉
Come to Beijing, redownload that Tinder app, and start livin’.
Bearer of Blonde News 